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“What do you call fish with no eyes?
Fshhhh”
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“What do you do if you see a spaceman?
Park in it, man.”
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“A cheetah and a lion are racing, and the cheetah wins. The lion says, “Hey! You a cheetah!” and the cheetah replies, “Nah… You lion!”
1 note
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“My friend bought a dog from a blacksmith. As soon as it got home, it made a bolt for the door.”
4 notes
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“#1: Knock, knock.
#2: Who’s there?
#1: To.
#2: To who?
#1: To whom.”
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“What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot.”
1 note
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“What time does Sean Connery usually show up at the Wimbledon?
Ten-ish.”
3 notes
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“I submitted ten puns to a pun contest, hoping one would win, but no pun in ten did.”
Tags: oneliner
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“What’s E.T. short for?
Because he’s got little legs.”
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“What do you call a nosey pepper?
Jalapeño business.”
